


If you want me to

by flyingisabetterwordforfalling (FlyingFalling)



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Asexual Enjolras, Caring, Cosette And Enjolras Are Siblings, Enjoltaire Week 2016, Established Enjolras/Grantaire, Families of Choice, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Holding Hands, M/M, Multi, established relationships - Freeform, exr week 2016, theme: died holding hands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-10
Updated: 2016-06-10
Packaged: 2018-07-14 07:27:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7159910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlyingFalling/pseuds/flyingisabetterwordforfalling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>By now the room was almost completly quiet, only their breathing could be heard. Grantire could have just reached out in that moment, and touch him, did not dare to do so. Would he startle the other, would he flinch away?<br/>Enjolras smiled, his lips did not move at all but his eyes showed his true emotions which Grantaire could see, recognized it as what it was despite the faint lighting. He glanced at him from the side, watched him as well. He seemed glad he was there with him and he could still barely comprehend that fond look only meant for him to see.</p>
            </blockquote>





	If you want me to

 

The room was by now almost shrouded in utter darkness, with the only source of light directly in front of them. Grantaire felt as if he had not slept in days as he looked at Enjolras, still fought to stay awake. He got closer nonetheless, watching Enjolras' movements, listening to his words until he eventually stopped speaking.

 

By now the room was almost completly quiet, only their breathing could be heard. Grantire could have just reached out in that moment, and touch him, did not dare to do so. Would he startle the other, would he flinch away?  
Enjolras smiled, his lips did not move at all but his eyes showed his true emotions which Grantaire could see, recognized it as what it was despite the faint lighting. He glanced at him from the side, watched him as well. He seemed glad he was there with him and he could still barely comprehend that fond look only meant for him to see. Their friends lay around them, most of them out cold. Combeferre lay in a position that could not be comfortable, still his head was pillowed on Courfeyrac's leg. He smiled, as if he would not have wanted to be anywhere but there tonight, with his friends, the ones he loved.  
  
Even if it meant laying in a room that was way too small for all of them, even more so now their group had grown since they finished school. Still, their game and movie nights had stayed, were a tradition they tried to keep arranging at least once every few months.

Jehan mumbled something in their sleep, and Grantaire finally managed to distract Enjolras enough to get him to let go of his controller. Bahorel lifted his head a little form were he lay on the ground, or rather an arirbed, glared at them as the two started to argue who should play the next level. Enjolras had failed the last few times, did not even took the game as serious as Grantaire did, who still sat next to him on the couch and once more tried to explain the game's rules and intention. Bahorel finally snarled at them, seemed ready to throw the book he was reading with a pocket lamp, all to glady at them just to get them to be quiet.  
  
"Get a room you two. What time is it anyway?"  
  
Grantaire leaned over Enjolras' lap to get a closer look at the digital clock on the coffee table. He lost his balance for a bit and almost crashed elbow first into the other's lap, thus sheepishly grinned up at Enjolras, who only grinned in visible embarrassment.  
  
"We'll take the game and finish it in my room.", Grantaire eventually decided, before he helped Enjolras get up without stumbling over the airbeds, or their friends, on the gound. Feuilly cuddled with Jehan, who lay next to Combeferre. How Courfeyrac somehow fitted between all of them at once whilst taking least space of the beds was a mystery. In the corner of the room lay Joly, besides him was as always his best friend and for a while now more than than, his partner Bossuet. The latter held hands with Joly's and his girlfriend Musichetta, who slept on the other couch.

Still, the most uncomfortable position to sleep in seemed to be the best one to be fast asleep, at least for Marius. He sat on the second couch, seemed to have tried to move as much as he could, so Musichetta could strech her legs. Therefore he awkwardly sat between her legs, by now almost seemed to hug his knees. His back rested against the armrest and his head had fallen back onto it. He snored and just like Jehan slightly mumbled in his sleep.  
  
Grantaire did not even wonder where Eponine was right now, she had gone right to her bedroom once the first ones announced they would try to get some sleep and warned all of them beforehand she would kick everyone out who tried to sleep in her bed. It was hers, and hers alone.  
Still, the only one who had gone to knock at her door had not come back by now. Due to a small accident during a boxing match Cosette suffered from slight back pain due to her bruises which she had not told the others about yet. However, Grantaire knew, mostly because he had been there when her opponent decided to play unfair. Worrying about her he had told Cosette she might as well just sleep in his bed and he would then take her airbed.  
What she did instead of accepting his offer had been to shake her head and smile at him, almost suggestive.  
  
"And ruin your chance to share a bed with my dear brother? Every other sister would think it's gross talking about her sibling's love life, but he likes you and, as you may know, I like both of you. And I don't even have to threaten to break your bones because you know I could, chouchcou." 

That little discussion had been a few hours ago and when Grantaire had gotten up to go to the toilet and also to check if the girls were asleep by now. The door had been slightly open when he had come closer to check if the lights were turned off because his roommate tended to simply fall asleep without turning off the lights, her laptop and other technical things. Eponine's cat had then rushed past his legs and into the room and he almost grinned when he spotted the two women in each others arms, and after a few moments the cat at their feet.

 

He would have to drop a few hints, that Cosette was not just nice to Eponine to please the group but also because she actually liked her, was maybe even interested in her.  
  
But now he held the person's hand he was interested in himself, and he tried not to smile at Enjolras stumbling behind him, trying to follow without crashing into everything along the way. Therefore he led him through the dark hallway as fast as he could and did not turn on the lights, fearing he might wake up the others if he did.  
  
"Ange, you know where my room is.", Grantaire joked.  
  
Enjolras yawned and nodded, his fingers grabbing Grantaire's a little tighter. Both knew how much he hated darkness, even more being alone when it was nighttime. Once Grantaire closed his bedroom door behind him he turned on the light and blinked when his eyes needed a while to adjust to the sudden bright light of the bedside lamp.  
  
He chuckled when he could see Enjolras' pyjamas more clearly. And the blush on his cheeks as he blinked and rubbed his eyes.  
  
"I still have them, so what.", he grumbled once he noticed Grantaire staring at him. Now Grantaire almost snorted, as he watched Enjolras as he turned around with a sarcastic smirk and moved his hands as if he was a model, presenting a unique outfit.  
  
"They are just the colous of our flag. You've probably got holes in them by now!", he protested, still amazed at Enjolras still looking incredible in his old pyjamas, once given to him as a joke by Grantaire himself.  
  
"I do not, and you are one to talk. You still sleep in your underwear and a shirt!"  
  
Grantaire crossed the room and lay his hands on the other man's shoulders, smiled at him without saying a word. He waited for Enjolras to look at him before he spoke.  
  
"Here we are, fighting over nothing. Just like then when we were still children. But now we're students, grown up. I love arguing with you, but please, not now. I'm honored you kept it, really and as strange as that may sound it suits you. And because I forgot to take the game with me we could just go to sleep already, if that is alright with you?"  
  
Enjolras nodded and climbed into Grantaire's bed as if he had done it many times before, which he had.  
  
"I promised to take your hand, you remember that, don't you?", Enjolras whispered after some time into the dark as Grantaire was almost falling asleep.  
  
"When you woke up after I thought you might have left us for good, Enjolras? After that damned demonstration, where every one just went crazy after some time and started throwing stuff at others? Or when the police joined in the fighting around us? Or the time you died about eight times in a row in that other game and screamed right into my ear when the jumpscare finally got you? You almost ripped my hand off, when you died the ninth time, but insisted holding my hand would calm you down.", Grantaire sounded sad and Enjolras did not even want to know in that very moment why he could still talk that much when he was barely even awake.  
  
"Yes, every time.", he simply answered and took Grantaire's hand, staring at the ceiling, even though he could not actually see it. "Every time, because I know you'll be there and I'm afraid you might let go one day.", he had always been as open and honest as he was now when he was about to fall asleep. They had their arguments, but once they shared a sleeping place and talked and talked for hours, they got along. Had learnt about that when they had been teenagers, and still kept this little tradition to be completely honest with each other like that, as adults.  
  
"I won't, you think too much. Rich, coming from me, I know. But please, just get some sleep already. You deserve as much sleep as you can get, the finals start in a while as you may know. And now, good night Enjolras.", Grantaire grumbled and rolled over to lay on his side. Enjolras mirrored his motion almost immediately, their joined hands now between them.

 

"Sleep well and love you.", Grantaire whispered sleepily and squeezed Enjolras's hand one more time before he fell asleep soon after. However, Enjolras had not been completely asleep by then. Their relationship had never been easy but in their eyes it was absoluetly worth it. Enjolras knew he was not completely sure if he was actually in love with Grantaire, was still open for an eventual relationship because he knew deep down inside him how much he meant to him, how much he could care about Grantaire even more in the future. He may not be sure if he was in love with him but he still cared about and loved him. Grantaire knew that and that mattered to him most, they were honest and talked about their differnces. What he did know was he was willing to die for Grantaire if he had to, to hold his hand for as long as he wanted him to be there next to him. He smiled the tiniest of smiles and despite knowing he would not be heard, answered.  
  
"Love you too."

 

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so tired and so glad I finished this before the day is officially over. I hope you liked and enjoyed reading it, as much as I did writing, and I'm happy to have been part of the Enjoltaire Week 2016 (even for just three days of it). :)


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